Bin there done that but used wire ties.
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Tie wire or electrical wire form the construction site works in a pinch also 
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That guy is either off his meds, or on his meds. I can’t decide.
Either way he is a good example of the balance a wife provides some guys. The centrifuge was a perfect “hold my beer” example where hopefully she would have stepped in.
BTW, I grew up separating cream and making butter from unpasteurized cows milk we got from a local farmer. All you have to do is gently rock the container. We had one gallon glass jars that we just rolled back and forth until the liquid and butter separated.
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I can’t believe @Kwikfab hasn’t made one of these yet… 
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Man, that Motorhead logo is a very tempting candidate for a sign project… 
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Or
“See what you can do without the guard?!”
Edit: I should mention that two days ago, a friend brought me an old cash registered that was from their family’s old gas station. It was in terrible condition and they only wanted to salvage the keys that you push for data entry. I started with various screw drivers, punches, picks and pliers and had to finally resort to an angle grinder and hammer. There were so many things in my way that I had to keep changing the abrasive blade to cut deeper past where the guard would allow.
When I started, the cash registered must have weighed about 60 pounds but when I was done, the parts seemed to weigh closer to 70 pounds when loose in a box. I promptly returned everything to the friend because I was not going to be responsible for disposing of all that…plus it was taking up space on my bench.
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I would be fine on that ladder
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I told you Keith, hold that damn ladder like I showed you...
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